It was the hat! Was it the hat?
It was raining on and off last Saturday so I figured it’d be the perfect opportunity for me to wear my seldom worn black newsboy hat. Ever since I watched "The Devil Wears Prada" I’ve been wanting a newsboy hat and since my mom was nice enough to treat me to one, I’ve had a hard time finding the right time to wear it. Although I would have preferred to wear it with knee high boots and a mini skirt, this overcast Saturday afternoon, I settled for skinny jeans, baby tee, jacket and the hat. Anyway, today was planned for supermarketing with the kids so I didn’t really need to be dressed up just comfortable. Besides, supermarketing is a twice monthly whole day affair in my life and since I was down in the dumps I figured the hat would keep me ‘incognito’.
Well, seriously, I don’t understand how a hat can be such a big deal. Everyone just had to stare, its like they’d never seen a human being wearing a hat before–so much for being incognito (snort)! At first, I was thinking that it was all in my imagination. I was probably feeling self conscious so my paranoia was getting the better of me but when Alie mentioned it,
"Ma, why is everybody staring at you?"
my first reaction was to take the hat off. But I stood firm. I am not, not going to take of my hat just because people are staring, I thought to myself, to he– with them. The hat stays on.
So the hat stayed on. From 5pm when we left the house up to 10pm the hat stayed on. Then it happened. I was walking back to SM Makati from where my car was parked (near North Park and Gerry’s Grill). SM was pretty much closed and the kids, yaya, my sister and her whole troop were waiting for me in the lobby. I was walking purposefully along Glorietta 1 beside the darkened glass windows of National Bookstore when a car pulled up (a Toyota Corolla 2003 model, dark blue color, I can’t recall the license plate # but I sure wish I did) alongside the curb and the window rolled down. As I was walking the car was slowly moving along beside me while some &*%hole had his head outside the driver’s window muttering something to me. Take note, this guy was not an ex pat so I can’t say he was clueless about the customs of our country or where the "real" hookers hang out (try Starbucks 6750 or Gloria Jeans, idiot!). He was 100% Philippine made. Always one to think on the bright side (me?), I thought maybe I had dropped something and he was telling me about it, so I stopped walking and looked behind me. There was nothing. I also looked around, to check if he really was talking to me. I found I was pretty much alone. When I didn’t respond to his mutterings he closed his window and drove off. By this time I was almost across the SM lobby and the first person I saw as I walked through the doors was my brother-in-law George.
"George! Some @#$hole just tried to pick me up! He actually thought I was a hooker! What the (*&$ gave him the idea I was for hire?" I ask incredulously. George just looks at me smiling while shaking his head from side to side and says matter of factly, "It’s the hat."
To make matters worse, my 16 year old nephew Nicky comes up behind him saying, "Nice hat! Where’s the go-go boots?" Well, that was it– the newsboy hat came off. I know George and Nicky were just teasing me but still, it stayed off the rest of the night and tucked away in my bag. The only remnant of its existence was the deep mark on my forehead where the hat’s rim once rested.
Pretty sad that Manila doesn’t seem ready for hats other than baseball caps. Either that or its not ready for me wearing a hat! Whatever the case, Mr. Toyota, I hope you get a bad case of Herpes.
I will wear my newsboy hat again…maybe not to shop but definitely, I will wear it again. So there.
